When Tarġa Gap Became a Cosmic Portal: The Day Sliema Stood Still

One Morning in Sliema…

In the seaside town of Sliema, where the waves kiss the promenade and the smell of ħobż biż-żejt wafts through the air, an extraordinary event unfolded that would baffle both locals and the gaggle of expats enjoying their slice of Maltese paradise. It was just past sunrise when the ground near Tarġa Gap began to emit a peculiar glow, turning the morning joggers into a captive audience.

“Oyyy mela! What’s this light show for breakfast?” exclaimed Zaren, whose mustache quivered with each syllable, his Maltese poodle trotting beside him.

With a Dash of Confusion

As crowds grew, theories began to flourish. Some speculated it was a disco revival, others swore it was the second coming of Elvis. But in the corner, clutching his pastizz like a lifebuoy, stood Emanuelu. “Uwejja, you think it’s aliens looking for the best spot to tan?” he chuckled, crumbs spraying from his mouth.

Landmarks and Lunacy

With a buzz louder than a horde of festa fireworks, the glow intensified, outshining even the bastions of Mdina in the distance. Smack dab in the middle of this luminous marvel, however, stood a bemused British expat named Nigel, who had inexplicably appeared there while he was reportedly touring the Azure Window in Gozo.

“Kollox was fine, and then – bam – I’m in Sliema with my snorkel still on!” Nigel exclaimed. Locals shook their heads at the sight – a tourist in flippers where no sea was in sight. It was a sight more bemusing than a priest in a nightclub.

A “Cosmic” Interview

“Pardon me, sir, but how did you feel stepping through a space-time portal?” a mock reporter asked.
“I was just chuffed I saved on the ferry fare,” Nigel replied, still wearing his goggles.

The Day Sliema Stood Still

Amidst this interdimensional crossroads, taxis refused to venture near, fearing fares across the universe. And while government officials scratched their heads, a local boy named Akkilez proposed selling tickets to the “Sliema Stargate.”

“Only five euros to switch life with a foreigner for a day, see the world – all proceeds go to my nanna’s figolla fund!” the opportunistic lad shouted, holding up a not-so-professional looking sign drawn in crayon.

Twist in the Ta’ Qali

As the day waned, an esteemed physicist from Ta’ Qali, Dr. Karmen Borg (yes, related to THAT Borg family), offered a less exciting explanation: a rogue science experiment gone awry from the local secondary school, misfiring across time and space.

“Our humble apologies,” Dr. Borg said, clearing her throat for the record. “It seems we accidentally tapped into cosmic string theory during a class demonstration on how to boil water without a kettle.”

Conclusion: The Portal Closes… For Now

The glow ebbed, and normalcy resumed. Nigel, clutching an armful of trinkets he swiped from an alternate Sliema, bid farewell to his brief celebrity status. Akkilez returned to his Nanna, who scolded him for not selling enough figolla tickets, and Tarġa Gap once again became just a spot for morning jogs and evening strolls.

Whether it was a cosmic event or just another Maltese mystery, the people of Sliema will always remember the day when their piece of the island became the center of the universe. And if nothing else, they can all proudly say, “Mela, Żgur that was something!“

Stay tuned for more “news” from the Times of Mela, where every story is as unexpected as finding a quiet spot on the bus during festa season.