Whodunit Wiċċ Imb Wiċċ: The Curious Case of the Disappearing Landmark

Chapter One: Breakfast and a Bamboozling

If you ever sauntered through the old streets of Valletta, you’d know that Malta’s capital is a place where history doesn’t just whisper; it bellows from every limestone corner. But on one peculiar morning, the city awoke to a silence so profound, it was as though history itself had been placed on mute. It all started with a hungry local named Wistin, whose love for pastizzi was exceeded only by his love for a good ol’ Maltese gossip.

As Wistin chomped on his cheesy delight by the iconic Triton Fountain – or rather, where the Triton Fountain used to be – he nearly choked on his flaky pastry. Mela, the fountain wasn’t just off; it had disappeared, leaving behind only a bemused flock of pigeons and a gaping hole in the ground.

Chapter Two: A Dive into Mdina Mystery

The news spread faster than butter on ħobż biż-żejt, reaching the silent city of Mdina by mid-morning. History buff and amateur sleuth Tarcisio, with his mustache twitching at the scent of a mystery, grabbed his magnifying glass and hopped on the next bus. His destination? The now-empty pit where Triton once blew his conch shell.

“Uwejja, this is more confusing than navigating through Sliema on a Saturday afternoon!” Tarcisio exclaimed to a bewildered tourist who was frantically updating her Instagram story with a #VanishedValletta hashtag.

Chapter Three: A Gozitan Twist

Meanwhile, across the crystalline waters in Gozo, the sister island known for tranquility and ġbejniet, an unlikely clue surfaced. Ċensu, a farmer who moonlighted as a part-time sculptor, found several mysterious trident-shaped stones in his field, each one resembling a miniature version of the Triton’s iconic fork.

What was this? A coincidental geological formation, or a clue left by the aquatic gods? Kollox was possible!

Chapter Four: Social Media Sensations and Side-splitting Suspicions

• @TritonWatcher: “Keep your eyes peeled, folks! The Triton Fountain might be popping up in a town near you! #MaltaMystery #FountainHeist”
• @ĊensuFarmerArtist: “Found these curious stones in my field today… Coincidence or curse of the mythical Neptune? #GozoGossip”
• @LostTourist: “Came for the history, stayed because the landmark I was visiting vanished. Guess that’s one way to extend your holiday? #VanishedValletta #ExtendedStay”

Chapter Five: The Unlikely Suspects

The plot thickened as three improbable perpetrators were nominated in the court of public opinion: a disgruntled mermaid, a time-traveling knight of St. John, and, believe it or not, a gang of streetwise cats fed up with being splashed by the fountain’s spray. Kollox goes in Malta!

Chapter Six: The Great Reveal

It turned out the “disappearance” was a case of mistaken identity – well, location to be precise. During a late-night revelry, a group of tourists mistook the instructions of their GPS, “turn right at the fountain,” and ended up mistaking a particularly shiny manhole cover for the historic landmark. They spent hours marveling at its “minimalistic charm” and “postmodern vibes,” completely oblivious to the actual fountain a mere block away.

Chapter Seven: A Humble Conclusion and a Feast

With the fountain’s reputation and physical presence fully restored, the city felt whole again. Wistin, Tarcisio, and Ċensu convened by the Triton, now very much in place, to celebrate the resolution of the curious case with a hearty meal of fenek stew and a round of kinnie.

“Ah, nothing says Malta like a good mystery, a bit of laughter, and a hardy meal shared wiċċ imb wiċċ,” Tarcisio mused, his mustache coated with a hint of rabbit sauce, as the trio burst into laughter, linking the past and present in the most Maltese way possible.

And as the sun set over the horizon, painting the skies with hues of orange and pink, the Triton Fountain glistened – beckoning to all those who love a good tale, a hearty laugh, and the unmistakable flavor of Malta.