The Mdina Misfit and the Great Gozo Gala Gaffe

A Most Mysterious Invitation

One fine morning, in the bustling village of Marsaxlokk, renowned for its fish so fresh you’d think they’d slap you with their tails, a curious character by the name of Żaren received an ornately decorated envelope. Żaren, whose reputation as the village’s most exuberant ħobż biż-żejt sandwich artist had spread far and wide, squinted at the golden letters:

“You are cordially invited to the inaugural Gozo Gala, hosted by none other than the illustrious Tumas Fenech Foundation for the Preservation of Maltese Pigeons.”

“Eh, pigeons?” Żaren exclaimed, scratching his head. “Since when does one throw galas for pigeons, huh?”

A Sticky Situation in Sliema

Meanwhile, in Sliema, the cosmopolitan hub of anything that’s anything, a peculiar news spread like wildfire across the promenade. Paula, the posh poodle pamperer, had mysteriously vanished during a heated argument over a badly coiffed cockapoo. People swore they saw her arguing with some ‘scary-looking’ dude who smelled of fenkata (rabbit stew).

The Plot Thickens

Back to Żaren, who, with an invitation in hand and wearing his Sunday-best tank top, boarded the ferry to Gozo while humming a tune. Little did he know, the waters were about to get choppier than the time Marsaxlokk Bay had more jellyfish than tourists.

The Gala and the Gozitan Ghost

Arriving at the majestic Citadel in Victoria, Gozo, Żaren found himself amidst a frenzy of activity. The streets were teeming with people from all walks of life, some seemingly confused, others undeniably curious.

The Accidental Medium

During the pompous affair, complete with pastizzi platters floating around, Żaren inadvertently spilled ġbejna juice on a rather ornate Ouija board set up for ‘interactive entertainment.’ To everyone’s shock, including Żaren’s, the planchette jerked to life, spelling out a cryptic message, “PAULA IS FINE,” before pointing directly at him.

Uwejja! The crowd gasped, and whispers spread like wildfire. “The ħobż biż-żejt man is a medium!” Before Żaren could wipe the last drops of sheep’s cheese from his fingers, he became Gozo’s hottest commodity.

Plot Twist: The Social Media Spectacle

Back in Sliema, as luck would have it, Paula reappeared with a smirk, steeling the limelight from Żaren’s unforeseen rise to mystical fame. Taking to social media, she posted:

“Kollox okay, darlings! A quick escape to Comino’s Blue Lagoon does wonders for the spirit, and horrors for the hair – I was not abducted by alien fenkata chefs. #BadHairDayEscape #NotGhosting”

But in Gozo, the tale had taken on a life of its own. “The Mdina Misfit” was now Gozo’s top trending hashtag, much to Żaren’s bemusement.

A Humble Hero’s Retort

When asked to comment on his newfound status, Żaren, never one to shy away from the limelight, told the Times of Mela:

“To be honest, I just came for the free pastizzi and maybe a dance with a local ghawdxija, but if Gozo needs a hero, then who am I to say no, hux? Plus, the pigeons do appreciate a good sandwich artist now and then.”

And just like that, Żaren the Żejtunian took his place as Gozo’s favorite supernatural son, sandwich maker by day and accidental mystic by night. Whether it was the pigeons or the pastizzi that worked the real magic, we’ll never know.

Mela, as the ferry chugged back to Marsaxlokk, Żaren pondered his next move in the never dull, eternally quirky life of a Maltese local hero, all while drafting the exotic flavors of his next ħobż biż-żejt masterpiece. And who knows? Perhaps next time, it’ll be “The Żejtunian and the Zebbug Zombie Zing”

Stay tuned for more tales from the enigmatic islands, where every day’s a gala and every pigeon’s a VIP – only on Times of Mela!