Times of Mela Exclusive: Mdina’s Time-Traveling Ħobż biż-Żejt

The Curious Case of Manwel Tabib, the Disgruntled Time-Traveler

In a shocking turn of multi-century disappointments, Manwel Tabib, a self-proclaimed time-traveler from the heart of Mdina, claims to have journeyed from the era of the Knights to modern times. His mission? To seek a good quality of living that the government of his time also, quite inconveniently, forgot to provide.

Manwel, dressed in an ornate yet slightly tattered garment that was apparently all the rage back in the 1560s, was seen wandering the narrow, silent streets of Mdina this past Friday. He brandished what he insisted was a magical ħobż biż-żejt—Malta’s beloved traditional snack—claimed to grant him passage through the ages.

Mystical Snack or Just Plain Il-Ħaġa Maltija?

“I was promised a utopia where everyone would have a palace like those in Valletta, a chariot in every garage, and pastizzi that never added a pound,” said Manwel, exasperation painting his face.

While the promise of a waist-friendly pastizz might be alluring, locals were baffled by the sight of a man claiming to be a medical professional from the past, blaming different generations of governments for his time-travel mishaps. A quick survey revealed that the residents of Mdina are not entirely convinced of Manwel’s claims, though are quite sympathetic to his quality-of-life gripes.

“It does seem like every hundred years or so, the people in charge just uwejja, they stop caring,” remarked Tessie, a local artisan who specializes in crafting miniature knights out of recycled aluminum foil.

Gozo, A Timeless Quality? Not Quite

Manwel Tabib’s travels didn’t stop at Mdina. He also made a pit stop in Gozo. Reports claim he was spotted at the Ġgantija Temples, enjoying what he described as “prehistoric peace and quiet.” However, not even Gozo, well-known for its comparative tranquility to mainland Malta, could fulfill his expectations.

“Back in my day, we had less traffic, fewer people, and somehow, even the sun was less scorching,” Manwel lamented.

The Interview That Spanned Centuries

“The government promised us flying horses and holographic pastizzis,” Manwel offered in a conversation that might as well have been extracted from a science fiction novel. “Instead, here I am, with a ħobż biż-żejt that has not aged a day and still no proper public transportation system!”

When asked how he managed to sustain himself through the ages, Manwel appeared coy. However, he did mention a mystical “source of life” that he could only describe as “something like this era’s Kinnie, but for longevity.”

Malta’s Response: A Collective, Good-Natured Shrug

While Manwel Tabib’s tale might have ruffled feathers in any other nation, Malta took the news in stride. “We’ve seen stranger things,” a fisherman from Marsaxlokk quipped. “Remember that time when that politician claimed he was abducted by aliens demanding a roundabout in every field? Mela, just another Tuesday for us.”

An Opportunity for Change, or Just Kollox as Usual?

Manwel Tabib’s appearance may be amusing, but it does reflect the concerns of Maltese citizens who are all too familiar with unfulfilled promises and the search for a better quality of life. Will his story prompt a dialogue about change, or will it just be another footnote in Malta’s rich tapestry of satire and folklore? Only time, and perhaps another time-traveling loaf of bread, will tell.

The ‘Times of Mela’ crew will keep you updated on Manwel’s journey. Will he return to his own time, or will he become a staple figure at the local festas, disgruntledly enjoying the vibrant life he found right here in present-day Malta? Stay tuned.