Famed Kollettiv Advocates for a Revolutionary Pigeon-Led Parliament

Eye in the Sky Politics

It’s been a topsy-turvy week in the Maltese political sphere as the infamous Kollettiv tal-Għasafar, a group well-known for their radical ideas, have taken to Valletta’s skies demanding a complete overhaul of the current parliamentary system. “It’s time to let the pigeons have a say,” squawked the leader, a charismatic gull named Fredu tal-Birgu, as he perched atop the Triton Fountain. “After all, we see everything from up here!”

The Feathered Proposition

Known for their audacious protests, like the time they festooned the Mosta Dome with sustainable straws, the Kollettiv insists that Malta’s parliamentary decisions should echo the ‘coo’ of the people. Their vision involves an aviary council where pigeons would roost in the House of Representatives, listening to the issues that Maltese citizens chirp about, and then voting by pecking at grain piles representing different policy choices.

“Traditional politics is for the birds, so why not actually make it by the birds?” Fredu was overheard telling an inquisitive flock over a brunch of scattered breadcrumbs by the Ħobż biż-żejt kiosk.

The Human Rebuttal

While some Mdina residents mused over this peck-uliar proposal, predominantly because it would draw tourists away from the Silent City’s famed falconry displays, not everyone was impressed. A Sliema councilor, Manwel tal-Fjuri, tweeted his discontent, which in a rare moment of Maltese online unity, wasn’t immediately drowned out by an argument over whether pastizzi should ever be sweet.

“Nature has its place, and it’s not in the parliament! Unless we’re talking about a rabbit stew debate, then it’s all ears.” Manwel’s tweet buzzed on local screens, adding, “And what next? Seagull senators? Absolute pandemonium!”

A Wing and a Prayer

The proposal, however, has gained unexpected support from Gozo, where local farmers praised the idea for its potential to keep the urban pigeon population in check. “If they’re busy with politics, they’re not pecking my crops,” chuckled Ġużi, a part-time philosopher and full-time radish cultivator. “It’s a win-win – we get less mess and more mess-engers of the people!”

Getting It Off the Ground

Despite the mixed reviews, the Kollettiv’s idea has taken flight, with various cafes and public benches abuzz with discussions about this new-feathered frontier. Perched on the grainy steps of historical anticipation, Malta wonders whether this might just be the beginning of a true ‘wing’ democracy or another flocking flash in the pan. Will Malta’s political scene see a flap of change, or will this revolution be grounded before it could even soar?

What the Peep-le Think

To gauge public opinion, ‘Times of Mela’ conducted an exclusive poll, asking the electorate – uwejja, everyone – for their take on this flapping new development.

• 67% felt a coo could be more effective than the current parliamentary hoots and hollers.
• 24% demanded a referendum, provided the ballot boxes were perched high enough.
• 9% were just here for the pastizzi debate and seemed quite disappointed.

Kollox considered, whether you’re for it, against it, or just pleasantly bemused by it, the Kollettiv’s idea has at least succeeded in getting everyone a-twitter with the endless possibilities. Stay tuned to ‘Times of Mela,’ dear readers, where we’ll keep you posted on whether this idea flies or falls.

The feathers continue to ruffle next week, when the Kollettiv plans to stage a fly-in at Ħaġar Qim, claiming it’s high time the stones themselves have a squawk in heritage conservation.